2021 Without Normal

I stepped outside tonight to let the dogs out and I breathed deeply of the night air. 

It's December in Texas, so there's a chill in the air; a hinting at Winter. However, I grew up in Ohio (right on Lake Erie), so blizzards and 6 foot snow mounds are a true demonstration of Winter in my mind. What I'm fortunate enough to experience here in North Dallas is but a glimpse of the havoc I endured growing up in Northeastern Ohio. 

I've lived in Texas for almost 5 years. While the winters are exponentially different from what I'm used to in Ohio (and even in Pennsylvania where I lived for 15 years prior to moving to Texas), they are still cold and crisp. The coldness takes your breath away at times, and the minute I step outside on a particulraly cold night, my mind is cleared. 

For some reason, this is when I feel closest to God. This is when I feel most likely to hear His voice.

In the stillness, in the quiet, this is when I am most caught off-guard and stilled enough--even if only for a moment--to hear Him. There is definitely something to be said for being surrounded by nature-His creation. Without the distraction of all the noise the world has to offer, I feel my most primitive, if that even makes sense. 

2020 has created a pause for us to ponder. We've questioned, weighed, evaluated. I know I have. My way of life was abruptly halted and the word "pivot" will forever be synonymous with this past year (and Friends, of course). Every area of our lives required rethinking, recalibrating, and rebooting. To be honest, my Spirtual life took a hit. I understood what "deep-water faith in the shallow end" looked like--or so I thought--and then when I was faced with unprecedented challenges I realized I was fooling myself into believing I was deep-sea diving in the kiddie pool. The truth is, my faith had never been challenged in this way before. I hadn't realized how much of my faith was based on the known and comfortable life I'd been living. All the sudden my cheese was not only moved, but squashed. I figuratively ran in circles trying to cling to the facade that was my security and in the process, struggled to hear God.

We're now 9 months into this "reset" and a "new normal" is establishing, but I'm not sure I want a new normal. Or even my old normal for that matter. Is normal really where I want to find myself? Normal by its definition means typical, expected. Is that what living for and like Christ should be? Normal? Expected? I want to live for the Supernatural. The unearthly that can only be brought about by God. Yes, I love traditions and the comfort of the known, but I don't want my relationship with God to be falsely based in my human expectations. Where does that leave room for God to work?

This coming year will look different for all of us. I'm hoping for my family that means better than what it was before. No longer do I want our Spiritual lives to look like a weekly to-do list with boxes to check and chores to cross off. I'm praying for the freedom and allowance for God to step in and work miracles in our lives each and every day--and eyes to see them. I'm praying for a renewed passion within my marriage and a hunger for God's Word in our family. I'm praying for children who live to serve God and look for opportunities to do that as Joe and I lead by example. 

I pray for a foundation built truly on the Rock and not a false sense of security that topples like a game of Jenga when one piece is shifted. 

That's my prayer for this year. What's yours?