Reining In Your Fingers

“Those who consider themselves religious and yet do not keep a tight rein on their tongues deceive themselves, and their religion is worthless.” ~James 1:26 NIV

I {Bethany} have become a little disheartened lately with the Christian women community. Reason being: As I look around and watch the women whom I look up to, encouragers and mentors that are helping shepherd the next generation of Christian women, I am a little disappointed in their actions.

Yes, they speak beautiful words about how much God loves us, show us how to walk in His ways, and even inspire us to become more by following His calling. But what is really bothering me is that fact that these women--women of God--are filled with a powerful desire to gossip about others.

With the age of social media, passive-aggressive whispers about others have become more prevalent in our community. We can say whatever we want in the comfort of our own homes behind a computer screen and never think twice about what we put out in the world and how we are treating another human being.

But what I feel others forget is that the written word can hurt just as much as the spoken one.

As an encourager, myself, I am very concerned with what I type and share on my blog or via social media. I have the power to build others up, or tear them down,  with just the push of a key on the keyboard. I can be a spark that sets a fire ablaze across the internet. Now, whether the fire is one of inspiration and encouragement or destruction and judgment, I get to decide, but either way, my actions can affect someone else and will show the depths of my heart and soul.

Am I striving to be Christ-like {as I should} or am I working towards my own self-fame and prideful wants?

I am not perfect by any means and sometimes I find myself typing out a passive-aggressive social media status, but catch myself and hit the delete button before I post. I am working to build others up so why would I want to put someone down? It doesn’t matter whether they are named or not, I know exactly who I was talking/writing about. The person I am referencing might even know who the status is about and will feel horrible because what I could have taken to them in private, I have placed before the world and opened to comments from outside sources.

We are not as stealthy as we would like to think and this type of action certainly doesn’t make us look good. We might get praise or get our friends to agree with us, but the one who we need to be in agreement with is deplored with our actions. God would NEVER approve!

With the written word on blogs and social media we have this wonderful filter called the delete button. We just need to use it more and more.

Here are a few scriptures to remember when the gossip bug bites you…

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Brothers and sisters, do not slander one another. Anyone who speaks against a brother and sister or judges them speaks against the law and judges it. When you judge the law, you are not keeping it, but sitting in judgement on it.” ~James 4:11

“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” ~Ephesians 4:29

“A gossip betrays a confidence, so avoid anyone who talks too much.” ~Proverbs 20:19


“A perverse person stirs up conflict, and a gossip separates close friends.” ~Proverbs 16:28